Yesterday is gone. All hail today.

I seem to keep forgetting just how fucked up my body gets when I haven't had enough sleep. That is exactly what happened yesterday. I was tired, cranky and fuzzy all day. My mental fail-safes were non-existent, so all bad thoughts came flooding in without filters. It all just built together to make a cycle of feeling tired and shitty.

I noticed things starting to shift when I was at dinner last night with my mom. We ate at Marven's in Parc-Ex. Good food, huge portions. Anyway, we were sitting there and I just looked around - above my mom was a moose head wearing a Santa hat, to our left were two Greek men, behind my mom was a Filipino family, next to them an Italian family, then an Indian family, then more Greeks. That was when it sunk in that I was back in Montreal. There are places I can go in this city and be the minority as a generic white mutt. It felt good.

Today the shift hit in full force. After class, I went to get a haircut. While I was sitting in the chair without my glasses, I stared at my reflection (read: what I could see of my reflection) in the mirror. I could see the dark shape of my hair, the shadows of my eye sockets and that was about it. My 5 O'Clock shadow changed the shape of my face, making it thinner. I looked like a blurry skeleton - featureless, gaunt, and pale. I knew it wasn't really my face, not the face that the world sees, nor the face that I see when wearing my glasses, but it still hit me a bit. I can't really describe it any better right now.

When I stepped outside the world felt as if it had clicked into place. All the reasons why I love cities, especially this city, came back to me. I walked through downtown with a bounce in my step and music in my ears. I saw all the adorable little people of this city. I saw the whores. I saw the metrosexuals. I saw the students, and the families. Things felt right again.

I couldn't find shoes on my way home (a mission that is proving more and more difficult.) Damn these wide feet of mine. I picked up some supplies from the Dollarama - lightbulbs and screwdrivers. Now, I have good lighting with which to try to fix my Playstation (and yes, I broke it. Shut up.)

My class schedule this semester looks like it is going to give me even more free time than last semester. I have one class on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. No class on Friday. Tuesdays though... Tuesdays will kill me. Tuesdays I go almost straight through from 4:15-10:30PM. That could very well hurt.

Anyway, it's about time to eat my leftover gyro pita and try to fix my PS2.

Lastly, I don't know if you are in town yet or not, but:

Welcome back to Montreal, redsneakers!